He Did It! He Paid A Credit Card Off!

Actually, I did it. He hates the budget. But, he knows it makes me happy, and it was part of our deal. Three months of budget and then we can discuss his debt his way.

But, here's a kicker for you fellow budget-freaks and penny pinchers: I've managed to funnel away enough money to pay off a credit card that will start incurring interest in October. I am hoping that his hours will continue to be plentiful and I can build his savings up and pay off that card, plus another one, I have just a few short weeks left.

DH is not that excited. He just shrugs it off. He said it's not a big deal since the payment was only $17.00...but in my eyes...$17.00 more to stash towards the next debt and one less credit card to worry about.

PPPPPPPPFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT!! My dear husband, irregardless of your stubborness and your lack of enthusiasm for paying off debt, I am quite proud of you.

Til Debt Do Us Part

I have recently found a t.v. show that helps me to keep on track with my budget and my financial goal (becoming debt free). That show: Til Debt Do Us Part - a show that my DVR records for me while I am away at work. It seems to be based in Europe, Canada and the northeast. A life planner, Gail Vaz-Oxlade, goes to a couple's residence, takes a look around, checks out their debt and the issues that have led them to it, and gives them a month to learn how to live new lives with three weeks consisting of two financial challenges and one relationship challenge, all the while reducing their debt. If, at the end of a month Gail is happy with the family's progress and they successfuly utilize a budget and take positive steps toward minimizing their debts, Gail gives them a check for no more than $5,000.00, and usually a weekend package away, to help with the relationship.

I enjoy it. Usually there is a spender: someone who is blissfully ignorant and digs the family deeper and deeper in debt. Then there is the person who feels that the whole world rests on their shoulders, however is not able to confront the other about their behavior. Gail helps to bring the two together and usually helps them to get on a game plan using canning jars to help visualize the budget (similar to Dave's Envelope System), and a budget binder, where the couple has to write down their spending to bring accountability to the relationship.

Almost every day I sit here on my couch and watch the show, all the while re-considering my budget and trying to get new ideas about how I can improve my plan and somehow get to my goal faster. It helps me to stay focused, letting me see directly how debt effects families and relationships, reminding me of why I want to become debt free. I see the sadness in the families, the tears the couples shed are real and sometimes heart-broken. While my relationship is no way near being on solid, unshakable ground, I would like to think that we are much stronger than those featured in the show. We have definitely had our problems, and I have recently learned that I coped with our issues by spending money I did not have. Thankfully, through my readings and studying my behavior and feelings, I have realized this. And DH and I have started back, together, on the journey of our life. I do not want to end up like the couples on the show, nearing the end of our marriage and in a horrible spiral out of control.

It's funny, if you think about it. How watching a simple t.v. show can make a difference in your life, such as this one has made in mine. DH even sits and watches it with me, when he's home. And we sit there and watch it, together. Sometimes I catch him stealing glances at me, especially when one of the show's subjects has admitted their sadness is caused by an unrealized behavior of the other. We were doing the same thing, and we have finally realized our wrong-doing, and vocalized it.

We know now what we were doing caused the other pain, and we try hard now to make sure that if even for a fleeting second, we make the other know that we are still there, and we love eachother. A simple grab of the hand, a tight hug, a note on the bathroom mirror or favorite cookies picked up on the way home. Something simple. Even staying up late with eachother to drink tea and laugh about something the kids did earlier that day.

Money is supposed to be the number one cause of divorce. Money issues come from a lack of communication. Lack of communication comes from being insecure - afraid of how the other person would react. But, we must learn to take that fear and have faith in our spouse that they will consider the problem, the pain, and be strong to help pull to you both out of the hole that can lead to debt, and to divorce.

Wow. Not exactly where I planned on going with telling you about one of my favorite shows...but insightful into myself.

Another One Bites the Dust!

Woohoo! I paid off another credit card today!!

My disability payment finally cleared this morning, and I went right onto my bill pay, checked the credit card balance, and paid that thing off! I have really tried since the first of the year to re-evaluate my budget and financial goals. These past few months I tightened my belt a little more and really thought about where every dollar went. While it is hard to reign myself in, I know that life will be so much better when I don't have to worry about my debts. So, four more to go! I know that these next ones will be a lot harder and take a little longer to pay off, however, I have a bigger "snowball" to put towards them. I also need to start putting money away for the summer - DD wants to go to an art class and then of course we have daycare for two - an extra $500 a month. Will have to wait and see...

The Today Show - This Morning

Good morning. For some reason I had to get up and turn the t.v. on this morning. The Today show was on with a title of "Frugal Fun". I try to pay attention to certain things television shows talk about, to see if there are any new ideas out there that I might follow. But most of the time, I am very disappointed. This morning was no different.

Three women (two guests and the co-host) were discussing how to be "frugal". They chatted up the idea that if you buy regular Starbucks every morning, you could save more money if you bought Dunkin' Donuts. THAT'S YOUR ADVICE?? Or this one: Buy Generic - Not Name Brand. ARE YOU SERIOUS?!?!

Here are my ideas: Make Your Own Coffee!! A large container of ground coffee can be bought for about $9.00 - and you can find coupons for $0.55 off certain brands of coffee. Then, buy a pound of sugar...right now there are tons of coupons for sugar due to the holidays. Or better yet, buy it in bulk and pour it in gallon zipper bags. Buy creamer on sale. Sunday papers almost always have coupons for it - usually $1.00 off. So there...that's more than a month's worth of coffee for less than $20!!

And obviously I believe in coupons. Almost every time I go shopping, I save at least $20.00 in coupons alone - this does not count my store discount cards and the sales that they offer.

I don't live frugally. I'm trying to spend my money smarter. I try to get things while they are on sale. I'm not using my credit cards and am still active in my debt snowball. I scour the internet for rebates. I do put away the money that I would have normally used elsewhere...and I watch it grow. I save my pocket change and use that to buy something "unnecessary" - a new lipstick or lunch out with the girls. Right now with the holidays coming, I'm trying to stick with my "cash is king" beliefs and buy only what I can actually afford. It's going to be a different Christmas for the family this year, but it will be less stressful, less damaging.

My biggest goal with my new (can I say that? It's been more than 8 months...) lifestyle is that my children will learn the importance of spending money wisely, of living debt-free. They have had to give up a lot of things, and I'm pretty sure they hate "the budget". But, I have tried to bring them into my activities...somebody holds the coupons...somebody helps write the grocery list...somebody keeps track of the spending and the saving. We cook together, we plan how long it will take to save to get that one thing somebody just has to have. We play games together, we play with the toys that we already have...we do things together.

If they get nothing else out of Mama's struggle to bring the family to debt freedom, I hope they remember all of the times we spent together as a family...and carry that with them to whatever families they go off to create.

My Debt Snowball - Repacked

Okay, so like I said earlier, my world has been going through some transitions. Thankfully, I've made it through. DH decided that he was done with the troubles at his old job and quit. Just like that. I know that I need to be supportive of his decision, and I am, however, I really wish that he would have discussed the situation more with me. I know that it wouldn't have made his situation at work any better, however, if we had discussed it we could have planned and prepared for the situations that followed. Thankfully, he was able to find a position with a competing company and there is not as much stress as the first week of our transition. He also seems very happy at this new place, a lot calmer, not so stressed.

So now that we have started to move forward with our lives, I have had to take on the health insurance for the family, which means that I had to re-draft my budget. At first thought, I did not want to and dreaded it. However, after a little contemplation, I am now excited. This means that there is a change in my snowball rut and it allows me to review my situation, debt, and begin an attack with a new perspective.

Unfortunately, I have built up quite a stack of medical bills in recent months, trying to get an old situation diagnosed and taken cared of. I sat down at the kitchen table, called and got current balances on all of my bills, and wrote them down, smallest to largest with minimum required payment and due dates. I then took out my budget, reduced it by the new insurance deduction, and practically cried. Right now I am still paying daycare fees for two. I know it is temporary, DD starts school in a week and I am hoping that I get her into a free program available at her school. Which will free up a little over a quarter of my income AND some much needed breathing room. But like I said, my budget is actually TO THE LAST CENT. Thank goodness I have my emergency fund and a small savings (I've been hoping to start school soon). So I will be okay until DD starts school. But still, I need to figure out ways to save as much money as humanly possible AND bring more in.

I now have a new grip on my debt, and with the new transition, I know that I will be able to move a little bit faster with my snowball. Not only have I made it by paying for two in daycare, but I am now paying for insurance. I am taking this new transition in life as a lesson. I should have done this a long time ago, but I have realized that I should have been working harder on my debt. Hindsight is 20/20, right?

I was born not knowing and have had only a little time to change that here and there. Richard Feynman

Dave Ramsey (TMMO)

I used to have a really bad case of "stuffitis". Really bad. I used to go shopping at the mall, walking out with BAGS of clothes and accessories. I used to go shopping for whole wardrobes, with matching shoes...just about every 4 to 5 months. I used to get makeovers at Sephora, every 6 months, each time buying every brush, blush, eyeshadow, eye cream, foundation, primer, moisturizer, base coat, lash extender, remover, filler, what ever they put on me. I used to buy the IT purse with the matching wallet every three months. I used to eat lunches at restaurants every day, spending at least $14, minimum. Those "have-it-all" stores, I couldn't walk out of there without spending a minimum of 2 hours and $114.00, even if I went in to buy a bottle of laundry detergent.

But, back in March I had Jury Duty. I didn't get to go home by lunch so I asked Hubby to buy me a book. I had just found this great group of women on Cafemom, raving about some bald guy named Dave Ramsey. So, I did a reading through the threads and decided to buy his "most recommended" book : The Total Money Makeover (TMMO).

At the time, I wasn't thinking that much about my finances, other than that THEY SUCKED!! I've always been good about creating a budget, but never stuck with it. I mean, come on, that's what all my pretty credit cards were for, in my brand new *DESIGNER LABEL* wallet, that fit and matched so perfectly in my *DESIGNER LABEL* purse, that, yes, was the IT bag of the season.

I read through TMMO in two days. Re-read it again, with a highlighter and stickies, just to really drill it in. And then, I re-created my budget. Amazingly, I have managed to stick with it. In almost three short months, I have MIRACULOUSLY managed to get rid of about $4,000.00 in debt. Amazing, since I make $2700 a month. And, I'm still working on it.

"How did you do it?" you ask? Honestly, I'm not quite sure. I have managed to pull up from the depths of my being some unknown form of self-control which has hidden itself from me for over a decade. I don't go in to any store anymore "just to look". If I do go shopping, I make sure I have a list, get only the items on the list, and then I must RUN out of the store. Incredible feats are happening now that I've been introduced to Dave.

I have also sold a ton of stuff both on craigslist and eBay. Almost all of my *DESIGNER LABEL* purses are gone, including the one with the pretty matching checkbook wallet. Some of the kids' toys, workout DVDs, some clothes, CDs. Sold. And each time I sold something, I went straight to the bank, deposited the money, came home and opened up my bill pay and put it all towards my debt. Just like that. Didn't stop to surf my favorite sites, didn't even stop on my way back for McDonald's. Just kept my blinders on and moved.

Dave's advice is simple. Actually, most of it is stuff we all already know. But it's something most of us fail to acknowledge and practice. Dave gives a list of Baby Steps to take on and follow through with. You have to know them, understand them, and then do them, in order. And they are baby steps because no one gets anywhere quickly. Not when it's worthwhile. If you take on Dave's challenge, you are striving to change your family tree. No longer will debt haunt you, your family, or your children's family. Your goal is to become debt-free. Your new motto is "Live like no one else so you can LIVE LIKE NO ONE ELSE". Can you imagine? If you didn't owe those credit card companies, the car financer, the mortgage company...how much money would you have to enjoy your life???? Would you finally be able to sleep at night, not worrying how you were going to pay for _________? How different would your life be?


Think about it. Consider this my challenge to you. Get to know my new friend, Dave Ramsey. Listen to what he has to say. And try being weird. You might just like it.

THE BASICS

First, CASH IS KING!! Cash only from here on out, baby!! Yup, if you don't have the money for it, it's not in the budget, you aren't getting it. WAH!!!!!!

Next, figure out your income (yeah, you would be surprised how many people don't know the answer to this). Then, make a budget. List out all of your debts with their minimum required payments. Then your bills: utilities, daycare, mortgage, phones (cellular and landline), and cable. Then, your "life" expenses: toiletries, gas, groceries, clothes, co-pays and prescriptions. You may have more, you may have less.

Now, are you FREAKING OUT? I was.

If what you budgeted out is greater than what you are bringing in - you need to roll up your sleeves, tighten your boots, and get into that budget and rip it apart. You need to figure out where you can cut somethings down or how to bring more in. Personally, I would see where I could cut out. Groceries are a big one. I reviewed my grocery receipts for a month (I'm a paper hoarder) and figured out how to save a minimum of $50 off my weekly budget by buying only what I needed, getting generic products, and using coupons. Cell phones are next: check into getting a cheaper plan, or even a cheaper provider. I used to have *HIGH DOLLAR PROVIDER*. I did some number crunching and PAID TO CANCEL MY SERVICE. $200 out the window. BUT, I was paying about $100 a month for something that I am now paying a little under $50 for. And, I talk A LOT MORE. It was completely worth it. I'm sure you get the picture. As for bringing more in, I've been doing some GPT sites and selling, selling, selling.

THE BABY STEPS

BABY STEP ONE: Get an EMERGENCY FUND. Get $1,000.00 NOW and put it away...keep it liquid (totally accessible). Dave says to keep it in a box in your house, somewhere where you can get it quickly. Personally, I keep mine at the bank, specifically with ING DIRECT. They give you a great interest rate.
Sell whatever you can to get your EF. Pay minimum on everything until you have it. Now, this is your EMERGENCY FUND. Not for dinner or birthdays or just because you see something you think you need. But for life's emergencies that fly at you just when you think everything is grand; Murphies. Remember Murphy's Law: If Anything Can Go Wrong It Will. Like a broken windshield while you are driving down the coast. Or the AC going out. Things of that nature.

BABY STEP TWO: The DEBT SNOWBALL. Gather up all your bills, your checkbook and your bank statements. Figure out your debts smallest to largest (not including your house). Put all that you can towards the smallest debt to pay it off in the least amount of time possible while still making minimum payments on your other debts. Done? Nope. You have to apply all that money you were paying towards that debt towards the next; keep it going, the more you pay off, the larger your "snowball" becomes.

BABY STEP THREE: Complete Your Emergency Fund. Now, you should be debt free except for your home. Your goal now is to create a fully funded Emergency Fund consistent of three to six months worth of income. You can put this money in the bank; even a money market account that will allow you to get to it if you need it without being penalized.

BABY STEP FOUR: Invest 15%. Yup. Prepare for the Inevitable. You should start investing 15% of your GROSS INCOME (not what you bring home, but before taxes) in a retirement fund.

BABY STEP FIVE: College Fund. Got kids? Now you can start investing heavily into their college funds. And you know what? Did you pay for your college? Did you have a job while you went to school? Guess what? It's okay for your kid to do it, too!! Teach them now the value of hard work and an education. Don't let them waste your money getting into Popularity U.

BABY STEP SIX: Pay Off The House. You got the money, now do it. Can you imagine? Being COMPLETELY DEBT FREE?!?!?!?! No Way. Guess what?? You can do it! And you know what, you aren't getting the tax break you think you are getting.

BABY STEP SEVEN: Build and Give. Now, I don't know about you, but I believe in giving back. Some people, those who belong to an organized religous group, believe in tithing. Some don't. But I believe that if you have something, you should share. I believe in giving back. Help those who need a boost in helping themselves. And continue to build your wealth. Invest in real estate, mutual funds and other financial vehicles. And give back. It will make you feel better.

Best of Luck!!